Pregnancy can be a difficult time for women. It is a time of many changes, both physical and emotional. Some women experience morning sickness, fatigue, and migraines, while others may experience mood swings or other emotional changes. These changes can also lead to stress in relationships.
A man with relationship issues asked the forum, “Am I wrong for telling my pregnant fiancée to get over herself?
Here’s his story:
The original poster (OP) got a dog (Corgi) two years ago. “She is very much my sidekick,” says OP.
OP has been with his fiancée for five years. “My fiancée does like the dog, but she is currently pregnant and experiencing massive migraines and has been snapping at everything,” explains OP.
OP’S DOG GOES NUTS AS SOON AS OP WAKES UP
When OP gets up every morning, he finds his fiancée already awake and relaxing at the table. But as soon as the OP gets out of bed, his dog goes nuts.
“It’s like super energy where she is running sideways, barking up a storm, jumping from the bed to the floor a million times (causing the apartment to shake because it’s old),” explains OP.
OP will sit there and sing made-up songs and play with the dog. “It is pretty noisy, and I can be loud. It’s just my way of interacting with my pet,” says OP.
“I also have ADHD, so I’m fully aware that I can be ridiculously loud, and sometimes I simply forget to tone it down,” he explains.
OP TRIED TO TONE DOWN AFTER HIS FIANCEE COMPLAINED
OP’s fiancée has complained about the noise a few times, and OP has tried to tone it down for a while. However, the second she stops complaining, it’s “out of sight, out of mind” for OP, and he starts doing it again.
“If I catch myself, I apologize immediately, but sometimes I don’t even catch myself doing it,” says OP.
OP’S FIANCEE HAS BEEN GETTING UP EARLIER FOR SOME QUIET TIME
OP’s fiancée has been getting up earlier than usual because she says she needs “peace and quiet away from you and the dog.” She says she can’t hear herself think when OP and his dog get up. She then starts getting migraines and is overall annoyed.
NOW, EVEN OP HAS STARTED GETTING UP EARLIER
OP can sense his fiancée is not in bed anymore. “After twenty minutes of her being gone and her warmth no longer there, I’m wide awake. And the dog also senses it,” says OP.
OP’s fiancée is now getting annoyed because she thinks OP is purposely not letting her have space and deliberately annoying her.
“I’m not, but it seems like it, I guess. I’ve tried lying in bed for a while so she can relax, but I get stir-crazy. I also don’t feel like I should have to stay in bed so she can be alone when I live here, too,” explains OP.
OP’S FIANCEE FINALLY LOST HER COOL
“This morning, I felt her sneaking out of bed at 5 a.m. and tiptoeing out of the room. I watched her sit at the table with her book,” informs the OP.
The OP’s dog saw him awake and immediately went ballistic. He started jumping on the bed, whining, barking, etc. So OP’s fiancée came in and said, “Will you guys calm down so I can have time to myself for once?”
HOW DID OP RESPOND?
OP side-eyed her because he was getting annoyed at this point with her demands. “I told her to get over herself. Just because she’s pregnant doesn’t mean I have to change who I am, how the household works, or my dynamic with my dog,” OP told his fiancée.
OP’s fiancée immediately left after shouting at OP, and she is not answering any calls now. She’s been gone for 6 hours.
“Am I wrong for telling her to get over herself?” asks the OP.
Here’s what the people on the forum had to say:
WHY CAN’T YOU LET HER HAVE A FEW MINUTES OF PEACE?
“Yes, you are wrong. This mindset is how women get branded as “nags” when their partners can’t just hold the smallest bit of consideration for others. Your partner is sneaking out of bed in the early morning hours to have a moment of peace and quiet to relax, and you can’t let her have it because if she isn’t actively complaining, you can’t respect her need for a few minutes of quiet!”
WHY DON’T YOU TAKE YOUR DOG OUTSIDE FOR A WHILE?
“She’s probably wondering how to keep you quiet so the baby can sleep.
Yes, you are wrong.
Why don’t you and the dog go outside, take a walk, or drive to a park and get the noise and nonsense done?
Someone else lives in your home now.”
OP NEEDS TO BREAK THIS HABIT BEFORE THE BABY IS BORN
“Seriously. OP needs to break this habit before the baby is born so he isn’t constantly waking up a newborn. He doesn’t think he needs to change his life for his pregnant girlfriend. He’s going to have a baby soon! Every part of his life will change. And getting a dog all worked up and jumpy around a baby is a terrible idea, too.”
OP, BETTER GET THAT DOG TRAINED ASAP
“OP, you better get that dog trained ASAP, or you will be given an ultimatum to choose: baby and fiancée or dog.”
HE IS PURPOSELY WINDING THE DOG UP
“It sounds like he purposely winds the dog up, not even attempting to calm it down. His fiancée wants a few minutes of peace, and he won’t even try to be considerate. OP is wrong.”
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