Weddings can be expensive, and many couples charge an attendance fee to help offset the costs. This fee can be used to cover the cost of food, drinks, venue rental, and other expenses. Attendance fees are becoming increasingly common, especially for destination weddings or weddings at high-end venues. A user asked on the forum, “Am I wrong if I asked my friend about the wedding guest attendance fee?.”
Here is the whole story.!
WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
OP’s college friend invited him to his wedding and asked for a $300 wedding gift. They also said that they would not be accepting non-cash contributions. Also, OP and a few of his friends wanted to bring their partners to the wedding.
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
OP’s friend mentioned that if guests got a plus one, then they would need to pay a $300 fee for their seat since they weren’t invited initially. The friend believed this was NOT fair because the wedding is already costing them $300 per person.
WHAT’S ANOTHER PROBLEM?
When OP checked the wedding venue’s pricing, he discovered it was $250 per person, which is $50 lesser than their friend quoted.
HOW IS OP FEELING ABOUT THE WHOLE THE SITUATION?
OP thinks he should attend the wedding because his friend wants them there. He also thinks it of a lifetime event for his friend, and he should be there to support the couple.
BUT OP REALLY WANTS TO TAKE HIS PARTNER ALONG
OP assumed his partner would be invited since the groom knows her. But, if OP brought his partner, he would have to pay an additional $300, which is a tradition in some cultures, and he is ok paying it but can’t justify why his friend is asking for more than the cost of the venue.
So OP is asking whether he is right or wrong in confronting his friend about the venue’s price. Here are some responses he got.!
DECLINE THE INVITATION
“An invitation is not an obligation. Decline. If your friend can’t afford to throw a wedding, then he should get married in a courthouse and have a modest gathering within his means. I see no point in asking him about the fee.”
YOUR FREIND IS STUPID
“You don’t charge your guests to attend your wedding. If you can’t afford it without doing that, you need to scale it back to something you can afford.”
SPEND 600$ ON POSH WEEKEND
“Dont bother to go and spend the $600 on a posh weekend away instead.”
NOT YOUR CONCERN TO PAY FOR WEDDING
“It’s not your job to pay for your friend’s wedding; asking for a monetary gift instead of a tangible gift is fine, asking for a specific amount that is quite a lot to cover the wedding is not fine. They choose to have the wedding at that location, not yours.”
MAKE YOURSELF UNAVAILABLE
“Inviting people to a party you cannot afford is extremely rude, then making them subsidize your event. That’s crazy. Make yourself unavailable. He’s badgering you because no one else is RSVPing yes, either.”
FREIND IS EXTREMELY TACKY
“Their decision to have a crazy expensive wedding is not on the guests. People have to pay for their weddings every day. This couple is expecting their guests to pay for it with interest!.”
YOUR FREIND IS GREEDY AND RUDE
“It is unbelievably greedy and so very rude to demand a $300 cash gift to attend. He is not your friend. He is using you as an ATM.”
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