He Refuses To Allow His Fiance’s Family Live In The Houses. Says, “I Know I Can Be Stubborn”. We Think He Is Right, You Decide.

Sharing is caring!

Family dynamics can be complicated, especially when it comes to houseguests. The interaction between various members is at the core of these complicated dynamics. A couple who live near the ocean with many tourist attractions have house guests regularly.

The problem occurred when OP refused to let his fiancée’s brother and family stay with them. He asked on the forum, “Am I wrong for letting my family stay at our house but refusing to let my fiancé’s family do the same?”

Here’s the whole story.


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

OP and his fiancée live together near the ocean with many tourist attractions. OP’s family from around the world regularly visit and stay with them. In return, OP and fiancé remain with them when they visit their cities for various reasons (work, vacation, etc).


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Last year OP had to travel to the city where his fiancée’s brother lives. She decided to come to visit him and his family. OP’s fiancée asked if they could stay with her brother, and he declined because he’s still protective of his family due to the world event.

“I understood at first, and we stayed at a hotel but later got annoyed because they had no problem going to dinner and out with us in public,” says OP.

Earlier this year, OP had to return to his city, and his fiancée came along to revisit them. He again declined her request to stay at their house, so we stayed at a hotel.

“I understand some people just don’t like to have overnight guests. The visit went smoothly, and everyone had a good time,” explains OP.


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Last week fiancée’s brother called to ask if he and his family could stay at OP’s place when they come there in a couple of weeks for their vacation. “I got annoyed at this because he didn’t let us stay at his house but wanted to stay at ours. I told my fiancé they could stay at a hotel,” says OP.


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

She argued they would need three rooms for seven days due to their family size. She then pointed out they always let OP’s family stay with them.

“I countered that is because we’re always invited to stay with my family whenever we visit their cities,” says OP. She argued family do things for each other without expecting anything in return. “We went back and forth until bed last night,” adds OP.


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“I’m sitting here having coffee while she’s sleeping, and I’m unsure if I’m wrong. On the one hand, I know I can be stubborn and petty. On the other hand, he doesn’t invite us to stay with him while expecting us to house him and his family,” he explains.

“What do you think,” he asks.

You are not wrong is the popular verdict.


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“You are not wrong. It’s bizarre that they would ask to stay with you after denying two of your requests (with a weird excuse). Additionally, if they require three hotel rooms, that’s a lot of houseguests. Just say no.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“It makes no sense that brother would be uncomfortable with having you two at their (presumably larger) home but magically okay with his family staying at your home. Ask what the difference is so you can know for future reference and planning.

You are not wrong for asking the question or saying no. Your fiancée’s  brother is wrong for creating the situation.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“Sure, he can stay. If you ask him why we must get a hotel when we see him but he’s entitled to stay at my place. I need to know. Then he’s free to do as he likes.

Let him stay but make him say why there’s a double standard.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“Maybe they’re hoarders, or something else is embarrassing about their house. You’re not totally “in” the family yet, so they can still be embarrassed for you to know everything. It might be embarrassing; they haven’t told your partner either.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“I’d just say I am not comfortable after recent world events.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“House guests are two yeses or one no. And I would say no in this case, especially because they have refused hospitality not once but twice, so give them a taste of their own medicine.”


Image Credit: Deposit Photos

“They’d be staying for a week but only provide two weeks of warning because they made plans before talking to OP about it. Someone’s trying to paint OP into a corner.”

Parents REFUSED To Give Daughter “Grandchildren Money” AFTER She Decided To Be Child-Free. Are They Punishing Her? We Don’t Think So!

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Is an adult child entitled to her parent’s savings? Do the parents have a right to reallocate their savings for another purpose? Check this post out to know the questions on the mind of a 58-year-old father and is he wrong for not giving my daughter the money that was reserved for my grandkids?

Parents Stole From Daughter’s “COLLEGE FUND” To Pay For Son’s Wedding And Now The Daughter Is Suing Them. Is She Wrong?

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Women face discrimination in terms of education in many countries around the world. So, it would mean the world to such a woman if she got the opportunity to go to college without student debt. But what if the people you trust take this opportunity away from you? Find out what happened!

To-be Bride Tells Her Future MIL That She Has No Say In Her Wedding Dress Choice. MIL Thinks She Is Kidding But We Think The Bride Is Correct.

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Wedding dress shopping can be a fun affair. It can be a day you spend with the people you are closest to while celebrating this momentous occasion. Unfortunately, it can also turn into a problem if the people with you do not have your best interest in mind. Here’s what happened.

Husband Keeps Correcting Wife’s Grammar. Says, “She Is A 4th Grade Teacher and It’s Her Job To Know Better” – Is This Suffocating Behavior or Is He Right?

Source: Deposit Photos

Are you a grammar nerd? If you often find yourself mentally correcting the spellings on a menu or fighting the urge to teach your friend the difference between ‘their’ & ‘there,’ you may belong to this group of grammar nerds. But should you correct people’s grammar if they haven’t asked for help? . Read more here!

Brother Decides To Drive and Pay For His Own Hotel On Vacation JUST To Avoid Babysitting Sister’s Children. Is This Right?

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Vacations are a time to relax and have fun. So what do you do if your family expects you to help with babysitting while on a family vacation? Is the brother wrong for saying I’ll be driving myself and paying for my own room on the upcoming family vacation so I won’t have to be a babysitter? Read more here!

Sharing is caring!

Anika is a CPA and founder of What Anika Says. She shares simple and actionable frugal living, money management and money-saving tips to live a debt-free financially independent life. She has been featured on popular websites like Bankrate, Forbes, Mint ,and Authority Magazine. Byline: MSN